Parents’ reactions to their child’s actions can either make their kid feel discouraged, or encouraged. There are no “bad” or “good” kids; only “discouraged” or “encouraged” children whose behavior reflects their parent’s reactions.
The 4 C’s of encouragement:
Connect
Kids receive unconditional love
Kids get a lot of loving eye contact
Kids get a lot of affectionate hugs and touches
Parents play and talk with their kids
Child’s feelings are listened to and validated
Parents have fun with their kid
Feel Capable
Kids learn skills
Kids are taught social skills and how to act
Mistakes are used as opportunities to learn
Kids are able to do a lot of things for themselves
Parents focus on the positive aspects of their child’s efforts
Parents show confidence in their child’s abilities
Count
Child’s ideas and opinions are respected and accepted
Parents show interests in their child’s interests and thoughts
Children are recognized as individuals of equal value
Kids are a part of family meeting, giving kids a equal voice
Contribute
Kids are given tasks, like household chores
Child’s help is accepted and appreciated
Child’s efforts are appreciated
Child is given responsibilities
Encouraging your child
Build on your child’s strengths
Show confidence in your child’s abilities
Appreciate your child’s abilities
Encourage your child’s independence
See your child’s performance through their eyes
Avoid putting child into “boxes” and encourage your child to do the things they are not so good at.
When parents encourage their child’s abilities, parents create limitless possibilities for their kids. Encouraged children will excel so much more in life than those kids who are put into “boxes” of what they are good at. Have confidence in your child and watch them achieve greatness!
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