How to Create Your Own Happiness - 2
An incident from one of my railroad journeys may suggest an answer. One morning in an old-style Pullman car approximately a halt-dozen of us were shaving in the men’s lounge. As always in such close and crowded quarters after a night on the train, this group of strangers was not disposed to be gay, and there was little conversation and that little was mostly mumbled.
Then a man came in wearing on his face a broad smile. He greeted us all with a cheery good morning, but received rather unenthusiastic grunts in return. As he went about his shaving he was humming, probably quite unconsciously, a gay little tune. It got a bit on the nerves of some of the men. Finally one said rather sarcastically, "You certainly seem to be happy this morning! Why all the cheer?" "Yes," the man answered, "as a matter of fact, I am happy. I do feel cheerful." Then he added, "I make it a habit to be happy."
That is all that was said, but I am sure that each man in that lounge left the train with those interesting words in mind, "I make it a habit to be happy."
The statement is really very profound, for our happiness or unhappiness depends to an important degree upon the habit of mind we cultivate. That collection of wise sayings, the book of Proverbs, tells us that ". . . he that is of a merry heart hath a continual feast." (Pr 15:15) In other words, cultivate the merry heart; that is, develop the happiness habit, and life will become a continual feast, which is to say you can enjoy life every day. Out of the happiness habit comes a happy life. And because we can cultivate a habit, we therefore have the power to create our own happiness.
The happiness habit is developed by simply practicing happy thinking. Make a mental list of happy thoughts and pass them through your mind several times every day. If an unhappiness thought should enter your mind, immediately stop, consciously eject it, and substitute a happiness thought. Every morning before arising, lie relaxed in bed and deliberately drop happy thoughts into your conscious mind. Let a series of pictures pass across your mind of each happy experience you expect to have during the day. Savor their joy. Such thoughts will help cause events to turn out that way. Do not affirm that things will not go well that day. By merely saying that, you can actually help to make it so. You will draw to yourself every factor, large and small, that will contribute to unhappy conditions. As a result, you will find yourself asking, "Why does everything go badly for me? What is the matter with everything?"
The reason can be directly traced to the manner in which you began the day in your thoughts.
Tomorrow try this plan instead. When you arise, say out loud three times this one sentence, "This is the day which the Lord hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it." (Ps 118:24) Only personalize it and say, "I will rejoice and be glad in it." Repeat it in a strong, clear voice and with positive tone and emphasis. The statement, of course, is from the Bible and it is a good cure for unhappiness. If you repeat that one sentence three times before breakfast and meditate on the meaning of the words you will change the character of the day by starting off with a happiness psychology.
While dressing or shaving or getting breakfast, say aloud a few such remarks as the following, "I believe this is going to be a wonderful day. I believe I can successfully handle all problems that will arise today. I feel good physically, mentally, emotionally. It is wonderful to be alive. I am grateful for all that I have had, for all that I now have, and for all that I shall have. Things aren’t going to fall apart. God is here and He is with me and He will see me through. I thank God for every good thing."
I once knew an unhappy sort of fellow who always said to his wife at breakfast, "This is going to be another tough day." He didn’t really think so, but he had a mental quirk whereby if he said it was going to be a tough day, it might turn out pretty well. But things really started going badly with him, which was not surprising, for if you visualize and affirm an unhappy outcome, you tend thereby to create just that type of condition. So affirm happy outcomes at the start of every day, and you will be surprised at how often things will turn out so.
But it is not sufficient to apply to the mind even such an important affirmation therapy as I have just suggested unless throughout the day you also base your actions and attitudes upon fundamental principles of happy living. One of the most simple and basic of such principles is that of human love and good will. It is amazing what happiness a sincere expression of compassion and tenderness will induce.
My friend Dr. Samuel Shoemaker once wrote a moving story about a mutual friend. Ralston Young is famous as Redcap No. 42 in the Grand Central Station in New York. He carries bags for a living, but his real job is living the spirit of Christ as a redcap in one of the world’s greatest railway stations. As he carries a man’s suitcase, he tries to share a little Christian fellowship with him. He carefully watches a customer to see if there is any way in which he can give him more courage and hope. He is very skillful in the way he goes about it too.
One day, for example, he was asked to take a little old lady to her train. She was in a wheel chair, so he took her down on the elevator. As he wheeled her into the elevator he noticed that there were tears in her eyes. Ralston Young stood there as the elevator descended, closed his eyes, and asked the Lord how he could help her, and the Lord gave him an idea. As he wheeled her off the elevator, he said with a smile, "Ma’am, if you don’t mind my saying so, that is a mighty pretty hat you are wearing."
She looked up at him and said, "Thank you."
"And I might add," he said, "that sure is a pretty dress you have on. I like it so much."
Being a woman, this appealed to her, and despite the fact that she was not feeling well, she brightened up and asked, "Why in the world did you say those nice things to me? It is very thoughtful of you."
"Well," he said, "I saw how unhappy you were. I saw that you were crying, and I just asked the Lord how I could help you. The Lord said, ‘Speak to her about her hat.’ The mention of the dress," he added, "was my own idea." Ralston Young and the Lord together knew how to get a woman’s mind off her troubles.
"Don’t you feel well?" he then asked.
"No," she replied. "I am constantly in pain. I am never free from it. Sometimes I think I can’t stand it. Do you, by any chance, know what it means to be in pain all the time?"
Ralston had an answer. "Yes, ma’am, I do, for I lost an eye, and it hurt like a hot iron day and night."
"But," she said, "you seem to be happy now. How did you accomplish it?"
By this time he had her in her seat in the train, and he said, "Just by prayer, ma’am, just by prayer."
Softly she asked, "Does prayer, just prayer, take your pain away?"
"Well," answered Ralston, "perhaps it doesn’t always take it away. I can’t say that it does, but it always helps to overcome it so it doesn’t seem like it hurts so much. Just keep on prayin’, ma’am, and I’ll pray tor you too."
Her tears were dried now, and she looked up at him with a lovely smile, took him by the hand, and said, "You’ve done me so much good."
A year passed, and one night in Grand Central Station Ralston Young was paged to come to the Information booth. A young woman was there who said, "I bring you a message from the dead. Before she died my mother told me to find you and to tell you how much you helped her last year when you took her to the train in her wheel chair. She will always remember you, even in eternity. She will remember you, for you were so kind and loving and understanding." Then the young woman burst into tears and sobbed in her grief.
Ralston stood quietly watching her. Then he said, "Don’t cry, missy, don’t cry. You shouldn’t cry. Give a prayer of thanksgiving."
Surprised, the girl said, "Why should I give a prayer of thanksgiving?"
"Because," said Ralston, "many people have become orphans much younger than you. You had your mother for a long, long time, and besides you still have her. You will see
her again. She is near to you now and she always will be near to you. Maybe," he said, "she is right with us now the two of us, as we talk."
The sobs ended and the tears dried. Ralston’s kindness had the same effect on the daughter as it had had on the mother. In this huge station, with thousands of people passing by, the two of them felt the presence of one who inspired this wonderful redcap to go around this way spreading love.
"Where love is," said Tolstoy, "God is," and, we might add, where God and love are, there is happiness. So a practical principle in creating happiness is to practice love.
(From Power Of Positive Thinking by Norman V Peale)
An incident from one of my railroad journeys may suggest an answer. One morning in an old-style Pullman car approximately a halt-dozen of us were shaving in the men’s lounge. As always in such close and crowded quarters after a night on the train, this group of strangers was not disposed to be gay, and there was little conversation and that little was mostly mumbled.
Then a man came in wearing on his face a broad smile. He greeted us all with a cheery good morning, but received rather unenthusiastic grunts in return. As he went about his shaving he was humming, probably quite unconsciously, a gay little tune. It got a bit on the nerves of some of the men. Finally one said rather sarcastically, "You certainly seem to be happy this morning! Why all the cheer?" "Yes," the man answered, "as a matter of fact, I am happy. I do feel cheerful." Then he added, "I make it a habit to be happy."
That is all that was said, but I am sure that each man in that lounge left the train with those interesting words in mind, "I make it a habit to be happy."
The statement is really very profound, for our happiness or unhappiness depends to an important degree upon the habit of mind we cultivate. That collection of wise sayings, the book of Proverbs, tells us that ". . . he that is of a merry heart hath a continual feast." (Pr 15:15) In other words, cultivate the merry heart; that is, develop the happiness habit, and life will become a continual feast, which is to say you can enjoy life every day. Out of the happiness habit comes a happy life. And because we can cultivate a habit, we therefore have the power to create our own happiness.
The happiness habit is developed by simply practicing happy thinking. Make a mental list of happy thoughts and pass them through your mind several times every day. If an unhappiness thought should enter your mind, immediately stop, consciously eject it, and substitute a happiness thought. Every morning before arising, lie relaxed in bed and deliberately drop happy thoughts into your conscious mind. Let a series of pictures pass across your mind of each happy experience you expect to have during the day. Savor their joy. Such thoughts will help cause events to turn out that way. Do not affirm that things will not go well that day. By merely saying that, you can actually help to make it so. You will draw to yourself every factor, large and small, that will contribute to unhappy conditions. As a result, you will find yourself asking, "Why does everything go badly for me? What is the matter with everything?"
The reason can be directly traced to the manner in which you began the day in your thoughts.
Tomorrow try this plan instead. When you arise, say out loud three times this one sentence, "This is the day which the Lord hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it." (Ps 118:24) Only personalize it and say, "I will rejoice and be glad in it." Repeat it in a strong, clear voice and with positive tone and emphasis. The statement, of course, is from the Bible and it is a good cure for unhappiness. If you repeat that one sentence three times before breakfast and meditate on the meaning of the words you will change the character of the day by starting off with a happiness psychology.
While dressing or shaving or getting breakfast, say aloud a few such remarks as the following, "I believe this is going to be a wonderful day. I believe I can successfully handle all problems that will arise today. I feel good physically, mentally, emotionally. It is wonderful to be alive. I am grateful for all that I have had, for all that I now have, and for all that I shall have. Things aren’t going to fall apart. God is here and He is with me and He will see me through. I thank God for every good thing."
I once knew an unhappy sort of fellow who always said to his wife at breakfast, "This is going to be another tough day." He didn’t really think so, but he had a mental quirk whereby if he said it was going to be a tough day, it might turn out pretty well. But things really started going badly with him, which was not surprising, for if you visualize and affirm an unhappy outcome, you tend thereby to create just that type of condition. So affirm happy outcomes at the start of every day, and you will be surprised at how often things will turn out so.
But it is not sufficient to apply to the mind even such an important affirmation therapy as I have just suggested unless throughout the day you also base your actions and attitudes upon fundamental principles of happy living. One of the most simple and basic of such principles is that of human love and good will. It is amazing what happiness a sincere expression of compassion and tenderness will induce.
My friend Dr. Samuel Shoemaker once wrote a moving story about a mutual friend. Ralston Young is famous as Redcap No. 42 in the Grand Central Station in New York. He carries bags for a living, but his real job is living the spirit of Christ as a redcap in one of the world’s greatest railway stations. As he carries a man’s suitcase, he tries to share a little Christian fellowship with him. He carefully watches a customer to see if there is any way in which he can give him more courage and hope. He is very skillful in the way he goes about it too.
One day, for example, he was asked to take a little old lady to her train. She was in a wheel chair, so he took her down on the elevator. As he wheeled her into the elevator he noticed that there were tears in her eyes. Ralston Young stood there as the elevator descended, closed his eyes, and asked the Lord how he could help her, and the Lord gave him an idea. As he wheeled her off the elevator, he said with a smile, "Ma’am, if you don’t mind my saying so, that is a mighty pretty hat you are wearing."
She looked up at him and said, "Thank you."
"And I might add," he said, "that sure is a pretty dress you have on. I like it so much."
Being a woman, this appealed to her, and despite the fact that she was not feeling well, she brightened up and asked, "Why in the world did you say those nice things to me? It is very thoughtful of you."
"Well," he said, "I saw how unhappy you were. I saw that you were crying, and I just asked the Lord how I could help you. The Lord said, ‘Speak to her about her hat.’ The mention of the dress," he added, "was my own idea." Ralston Young and the Lord together knew how to get a woman’s mind off her troubles.
"Don’t you feel well?" he then asked.
"No," she replied. "I am constantly in pain. I am never free from it. Sometimes I think I can’t stand it. Do you, by any chance, know what it means to be in pain all the time?"
Ralston had an answer. "Yes, ma’am, I do, for I lost an eye, and it hurt like a hot iron day and night."
"But," she said, "you seem to be happy now. How did you accomplish it?"
By this time he had her in her seat in the train, and he said, "Just by prayer, ma’am, just by prayer."
Softly she asked, "Does prayer, just prayer, take your pain away?"
"Well," answered Ralston, "perhaps it doesn’t always take it away. I can’t say that it does, but it always helps to overcome it so it doesn’t seem like it hurts so much. Just keep on prayin’, ma’am, and I’ll pray tor you too."
Her tears were dried now, and she looked up at him with a lovely smile, took him by the hand, and said, "You’ve done me so much good."
A year passed, and one night in Grand Central Station Ralston Young was paged to come to the Information booth. A young woman was there who said, "I bring you a message from the dead. Before she died my mother told me to find you and to tell you how much you helped her last year when you took her to the train in her wheel chair. She will always remember you, even in eternity. She will remember you, for you were so kind and loving and understanding." Then the young woman burst into tears and sobbed in her grief.
Ralston stood quietly watching her. Then he said, "Don’t cry, missy, don’t cry. You shouldn’t cry. Give a prayer of thanksgiving."
Surprised, the girl said, "Why should I give a prayer of thanksgiving?"
"Because," said Ralston, "many people have become orphans much younger than you. You had your mother for a long, long time, and besides you still have her. You will see
her again. She is near to you now and she always will be near to you. Maybe," he said, "she is right with us now the two of us, as we talk."
The sobs ended and the tears dried. Ralston’s kindness had the same effect on the daughter as it had had on the mother. In this huge station, with thousands of people passing by, the two of them felt the presence of one who inspired this wonderful redcap to go around this way spreading love.
"Where love is," said Tolstoy, "God is," and, we might add, where God and love are, there is happiness. So a practical principle in creating happiness is to practice love.
(From Power Of Positive Thinking by Norman V Peale)
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